Demi Moore, Taxes, World Oil Demand, National Health Care, Mike Huckabee, Sports, George Bush, Conservatives, Liberals, Boat Drinks, War, World Domination…

Posted on December 7, 2007. Filed under: Camping, General Posts | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Greetings Campers,

Happy Pre-camp eve. I hope all you little campers have stuffed your stockings… deep in your back pack, dug out last years camp cookware, cleaned most of the crust off, and checked the sleeping bag for little woodland critters. Cause its Pre-Camp Eve!!!

Todays headline is a little different than most WCQ headlines. The reason is that I thought I would highlight some of the possible topics up for discussion around the campfire.

Both Senior Campers have discussed an addition to the camp that is a sensitive subject. Sensitive because of two reasons.
1. It is a politically incorrect topic.
2. It is a maritally incorrect topic.
The topic I refer to is the camp squaw. We have always felt that having a camp squaw would be a great addition to the camp. We understand that term “camp squaw” can have a bad connotation in our politicly correct times, but we mean only to pay tribute to the great westerns we all grew up with. In the old westerns, the camp squaw was a revered member of the camp. Providing food for the campers and keeping their male egos in check, all the while showing her intellectual superiority over all the men. In this light we feel a camp squaw would be a great addition to camp. Problem #2. The Senior Campers wives read the WCQ and while not willing to step up and volunteer for camp squaw duties, would still frown on the addition of an actual camp squaw. Now my beautiful, charming, intelligent, and loving bride is the forgiving type, Wilderness Doug’s is not. I think I mentioned that WD’s wife Angie is evil. She is not the type of gal to kick him to the curb or out if she becomes displeased with him. She is more of the type to stay closed by and torture him for the rest of his sorry miserable life until he is embraced by the peace that death will bring. This being said the senior campers are going to debate the addition of a fantasy camp squaw. I will start the nomination with two who I feel would look good in buckskin. Young Demi Moore demi_moore.jpg Very Young Cher cher.jpg

Based on the above pictures, I think Demi Moore is a hands down winner. Who else should be nominated for buckskin?

Taxes

There is a big disagreement on this one in camp. Captn Rob is a believer in the “Fair Tax” Wilderness Doug is not. We will discuss this more fully at camp.

World Oil Demand and Supply

This topic plays to Wilderness Doug’s strength as he works in the oil industry. The god Captn has uncoverd information that indicates that oil is a renewable resource. I can already feel the disdain that will be piled on me for this one!

National Health Care.

Does anyone really have a clue on this one? I feel government needs to stay out of it. WD feels government is the answer. Bla, Bla, Bla…

Mike Huckabee See Taxes

Sports Tom Brady, New England Patriots, and why we hate them. Indianapolis Colts, Chicago Bears, and why we love them and are disappointed by them.

George Bush, war, and all the rest, I will report on on Monday. Have a good weekend. I’ll check in on Monday!

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Who’s a winter camper?

Posted on October 20, 2007. Filed under: Random thoughts from an idle mind | Tags: , , , , , , |

Way back in the far reaches of time, there were a couple of regular guys. This was so long ago that there were no Motorola cell phones, No Blackberry’s, No IPods, No Dell Laptop Computers, Apple was a fruit. Bill Gates was still unknown. McDonald’s still served sandwiches in Styrofoam. Coke, and Budwiser cans still had pull tabs. No-one had heard of a CD let alone Blueray. A 26″ RCA was a big screen TV. Only women drank Tab. It was an analog world and these two were a couple of analog guys.

Doug Lemond was a former high school baseball player married to his high school sweetheart with a new born daughter. He worked at a shoe store which at that time was called The Athlete’s Foot. It later became known as the Finish Line. At “The Foot as we called it then, Doug met Rob Wagoner, (That’s me, your charming and delightful blogger) and they struck up a friendship.

Rob had just started dating a girl who would eventually become his wife. She probably already knew that, but like all regular guys Rob didn’t have a clue. The two couples would get together every so often and drink wine and play cards. Doug and Rob would also go out on occasion for a few of their favorite adult beverages. Somehow, much to their dismay, Rob and Doug found themselves in hot water with the spouse and future spouse each time they went out on their own. Being logical (Cause they are guys), and being guys they decided to come up with a plan. They would do something, that would be fun, where they could invite the girls, and still have a 100% chance that the girls would give their blessing and not want to go. After a few adult beverages they came up with their ingenious plan. Let’s go camping in February!!! Tada!

The next time all four were back together, Doug and Rob announced their camping plan. It was received by the women (at first) in the exact way our two heros thought it would be received. They invited the women to go camping and were told in no uncertain terms no way were they going camping when it was cold. This is where things started to go wrong. I don’t think i mentioned it before, but Doug’s beautiful wife who I dearly love and respect, Angie, is evil. Not just a little evil, a lot evil, and smart. Not a good combination if you are married to her or hang out with the guy who is married to her. You see the ingenious part of Doug and Rob’s plan was that they would spend a number of evenings with the guys having adult beverages “planning” the camping trip. If they had enough of these “planning” meetings the spouse and future spouse would see these as part of the normal routine and Doug and Rob would then stay out of hot water. If they planned long enough the weather would turn moderate before they actually went camping. As I mentioned, Angie is evil. She is also smart. She knew that if she called Doug’s manhood into question, she could force him to do something he wasn’t planning on doing. (Like camping in February) So the next time the group was together, Angie started in with when are you two sissys going camping. Real men would go on the coldest weekend of the year. You know the drill. Those kind of challenges can’t be ignored. That type of challenge has to be taken, so we went.

Everyone thought we were nuts, including us. No one died, or froze. We had bad equipment. We had a great time. That is how winter camping started and Wilderness Doug and Captn Rob were created.

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    There is a fine line between bravery and stupidity, and we are stomping all over it.

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